Heavy Heart

It is with a very heavy heart that I write this, a real life event that has been on my mind and in my heart ever since I heard the news two nights ago. It is not my story to tell, so I won't get into any details, not that I know many, not that I want to know many (it is too hard), but I feel like this could be a wake up call to someone. My cousin's baby died during a nap from SIDS. He was asleep on his belly, and did not wake up.

SIDS is real. It happens, and it is terrible.  

I have been in a foggy daze ever since I heard the news, and cannot imagine.... I just cannot imagine how my cousin, his wife, and my aunt and uncle are feeling.

Sweet Ethan Wyatt, your whole family loves you. 

Hug your babies tight as often as you can, and pray for families who can't hug their babies with their arms but only their hearts. 

Pray for them to have more peaceful moments than not, pray for comfort for their hurting hearts. 

Homecoming!

Dear sweet baby Jesus, is Charlotte seriously home? And why in the world do I miss the NICU? 

Actually, I can tell you why I kinda miss the NICU... you see, when you are there, the nurses make your bottles and warm them, and will even change your baby's diaper if for some reason you don't want to. And, oh yeah, at night, they take amazing care of your baby even while you are peacefully sleeping 8 straight hours in your lovely king sized bed. 

Well, as happy as I am to have her home, SO happy by the way.... we had a superbly rough night last night. Each night nurse I talked to on the phone told me that Charlotte loooooved to be awake at night. Like, no matter when I called. While I thought it was strange, it didn't quite resonate how it would affect me when I took her home. 

She was up. ALL. Night. Long. Like, ALLLLLL night long. She would eat, then squirm and grunt and groan and cry and want her pacifier. The same pacifier that she can't quite keep in her mouth by herself. And then she would settle for about 10-15 minutes, and then the cycle would repeat. Holy Moly. I am so exhausted today I can't even think straight!

All that being said, I LOVE having her home. She is HOME!! She is eating, and sleeping well during the day, and hopefully tonight will be better, but we feel so blessed that our little miracle baby is home with us! In our arms without cords and wires at last! 

We have been through so many scary and iffy times since January, and she is HERE. She is healthy. I think that when both your neonatologist AND pediatrician call her a miracle baby, you realize what a fighter you have on your hands. 

Sweet Charlotte, I can't wait to spend all summer with you and your brother!

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Hunter is ONE!

My baby is ONE!! While, I wasn't with him much on his real birthday.... you know, being in the hospital and such, we were able to celebrate his birthday a little early. I figured that this would be the one and only party where I get to solely pick his theme. I can already imagine what his theme may be for next time around (Bubble Guppies, anyone?), so for this party, mommy chose SOCK MONKEYS!!

I had a big grand party in my head from the beginning, but when things went crazy with the pregnancy the party kept getting more and more downscaled. In the end it turned out perfect, and Hunter and all of his friends had a blast!

Here are some pictures from his big day, there aren't many, because I was too busy enjoying it with him!

Here are the kids playing at the water table..... while Hunter wanted to dig in the dirt!

Some of our decor, I can't believe I didn't take pictures of it all!

Cake!!

Presents!!

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